undressing my true self and my clothes free passions

Fall is here and winter is coming, and in some ways, that means that I am having to put on more layers: jackets, leggings, hats. I’ve been stubbornly avoiding closed-toed shoes, but as the temperature drops and the chill in the air raises the hair on my skin, I find I need to cover myself a little bit more every few weeks, and warm shoes are likely the next surrender. 

 Yet, I have also been undressing more than I have in a long time, perhaps ever in my life. About a month ago, I turned a page: I started having difficult honest conversations with family, colleagues and friends about things I had been avoiding for years. I have to credit this shift to my clothes free life, the experiences I have had this year, and most importantly my clothes free yoga practice. There’s nothing like breathing through an uncomfortable pose that I dislike for 2-10 minutes while being clothes free to help me build the endurance to sit with, well, anything that could be uncomfortable. Clothes free camping this summer, too, showed me that, if I can live outside for a week without clothes with a bug or two touching me and only the most basic of items and be completely happy, I can find a way to thrive, no matter the repercussions of these difficult conversations. So, I have a willingness to talk about the things I feared, the things that were uncomfortable, because I know that it will all be fine on the other side.

 I have talked with my boss at my main job about 1) my individual challenges at work, 2) issues I observe in the organization, and 3) my intentions for academic and career development, which could mean a departure from both the job and the city. I have talked with my other boss about my intentions at that job as well. Let me tell you, I used to fear talking with my bosses in this manner. I was afraid of what they thought, because I wanted their approval, acceptance and love. But, these past 15 months of clothes free life have connected me deeply with my own body and to deep passions awakening inside of me. I no longer care about having my bosses’ approval, because I know who I am now, what is important to me and my purpose. I have vision. So, I don’t need their acceptance, because I accept myself and I know that the work I’m doing in my life is blessing others and has the potential to bless even more people.
This is not to say that my life is a breeze. In fact, there are times where I have to pull back from social activity, whether online or in person, in order to restore after having such raw conversations. In these times, I allow myself to feel: I cry, I feel anger, I feel sadness and longing, I miss people…and I allow those feelings space to move freely. Sometimes I practice yoga clothes free and allow the dance of my body to facilitate “feeling.” At other times, I write in my journals. I have also taken to drawing as therapy. I never thought I would do this; I haven’t taken art classes in while (if ever, I forget), and I generally get more excited about just looking at the colors of paint, crayons and markers, than actually using them. But, one day I found myself at work with only 20 minutes left in the day, and the itch hit me. I walked to the copy machine, took a piece of paper out of one of the trays, grabbed a pencil and sketched a picture of one of my friends. All of these things have been a huge resource in my clothes free retreat time to support me as I make big moves in my life.

One of the more upbeat and exciting ways in which I have been undressing, is talking to more people about my clothes free life. It’s not that I run around the street screaming at the top of my lungs randomly. But, I am opening up to people, because, given the healing and empowerment I have been experiencing, I am convinced that clothes free life can be a true tool for others to access healing and empowerment for themselves, too.

mythemeshop sml

 Last night, for instance, I was with a new group of friends, and one of them asked me, “So what is it that you want to do in your life?” In the past, these kinds of questions have given my brain the blue screen of death. Not anymore. “I want to teach naked yoga, get a master’s in Psychology, and offer some kind of naked therapy. None of this being sexual. But, I spend most of my life naked. And ever since I started doing that, I have been able to access all kinds of things. Like, when I’m at work and I work clothes free, all the things that were confusing become clear, whether I find a way to solve a problem or I simply understand what questions I need to ask in order to move forward in a process.” And when I talk about all this with people, I use the same tone as anyone would use when describing any other goal such as wanting to get a new job, own 10 cats, or build a farm. The more I talk about it like it’s normal and in the context of my own authentic experiences, the more people in my world hear and receive it as normal, even though they might not have ever considered it prior to the conversation.

So, it is fine that the weather is getting colder and that I have to, maybe this weekend, buy some spacious closed-toed shoes for the dropping temperatures, because I am undressing in these other ways and preparing to give birth to the passions that have sprouted in my soul.

6 Comments

  1. nakedyogayyc October 30, 2015
  2. ...Tom October 22, 2015
  3. naturalian October 18, 2015
  4. naturalian October 18, 2015
  5. Naturist Fab October 17, 2015
  6. Naturist Fab October 17, 2015

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