As part of our Women on Wednesdays theme today, contributor Moniqua shares about her experiences with interactions through social media and how she has negotiated the online space to best support her needs.
About a month or so ago I deactivated my naturist Instagram (IG) account and completely deleted my Twitter account. I have only come out as clothes free this year, so I still consider myself a newbie even though I have been clothes free for many years.
My first introduction into clothes free life came from the clothesfreelife.com (CFL) curator, Earl D, when I stumbled upon his IG page. It was during a time when I was heavily into yoga. Seeing his page inspired me to do clothes free yoga at home and I noticed the change. I also saw many others do yoga clothes free and became inspired. Then I stumbled upon the CFL IG page. That’s when I knew that it was time for me to truly be myself.
After a while, it became overwhelming and I temporarily deactivated my IG page and deleted my Twitter page. I think I jumped in too quickly and wasn’t ready for all of that.
Fast forward to me finally creating a clothes free page on IG and then Twitter. I was very naïve to think that me posting nude photos in a nonsexual way would mean that I wouldn’t still receive unwanted attention. I still got dick pics and I was getting dick pics before coming out as clothes free. I set my page to private, but I received so many follow requests perhaps mainly due to my profile pic. Who knows?
Anyway, I started receiving direct messages (DMs) from several men of full frontal perspectives and erections. These people weren’t even following me, but I guess I brought that upon myself since my bio said “DM for entry.” After a while, it became overwhelming and I temporarily deactivated my IG page and deleted my Twitter page. I think I jumped in too quickly and wasn’t ready for all of that.
After a couple of months of reflection, picking up journalism, lots of prayer and meditation, I realized that I was letting all of that get to me when I could’ve just blocked them or set my DMs to followers only. I have realized that I was letting penises oppress my clothes freedom. I was letting men control me being me. It is not my fault that there are men, and women, who are so perverse that even nonsexual photos are sexual to them, an invitation to be explicitly inappropriate and without permission.
If it has nothing to do with clothes free yoga or you doing something natural around the house or outside, don’t send it to me.
I am no hardcore feminist or anything of that nature, but I do believe that people should check themselves and think before they send people sexual photos. Do you really think that all women want to see your penis erect and you posing in a suggestive way? Do women actually entertain that? If so, those women have no self-respect. It is exceptionally disrespectful to send sexually explicit nudes without permission. There are certain photos that are acceptable to send me, although I can’t speak for any other nudist. If it has nothing to do with clothes free yoga or you doing something natural around the house or outside, don’t send it to me. If it is not showing you being nude at a nudist beach, resort or what have you, don’t send it to me. You will be blocked.
I have reactivated my IG account but I will not be making another Twitter. I will no longer be controlled by male genitalia when it comes to being myself on social media. I want to let other newbie clothes free females, and males, know that you do not have to be deterred from expressing your clothes free life because a few people can’t control their hormones. It is not your fault and don’t feel ashamed.
Love and Clothes Free,